Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
