man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
