i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
