Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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