how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize