Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
