Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize
