Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
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