Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
