i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
