I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
we're making bets on your personal life
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Randomize
