I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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