This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
