I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
