But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
