No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
