i barfeds in our rink
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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