grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
