At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Randomize