I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i think my tv is drunk
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
