I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
