Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
