I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize