brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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