i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
