the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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