I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
