If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Randomize
