This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Randomize
