ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Buhtt sex?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize