You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
