I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
