His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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