:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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