I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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