All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
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