Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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