your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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