His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize