You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
