Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
