Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
