am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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