great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
