Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
