Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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