I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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