dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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