yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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