Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
